Weak economy calls for new, ‘controversial’ hobby

By Connor De Bruler

When I turn 21 I’m going to start brewing and distilling my own absinthe.

I have never actually tried absinthe. When I lived abroad, my parents wouldn’t allow me to buy it. When I returned to the U.S.,it was outlawed until the next year, 2007. Of course, I’m also underage.

I first got the idea from bread. That’s right: bread. My dad makes homemade bread all the time.

He works in an automotive factory with machines and mathematics all day long. When he comes home, however, he transforms into an amateur baker.

It took him a few years to refine his recipe, but since he did, he’s been making awesome bread; sweet breads, whole wheat, French baguettes and German bauer brot. He’s gotten really good.

When he makes it in the kitchen, he looks very peaceful and it gives him a sense of  accomplishment. It was inspiring.

I wanted to do the same thing.

But I thought bread was boring. I wanted to make liquor.

Absinthe, originally from Switzerland, is an anise and wormwood-based spirit, famous for having an ethereal green hue.
It is typically anywhere between 45 to 74 percent alcohol by volume. That’s where the controversy comes from.

Absinthe is very, very strong and is by no means meant to be consumed in large quantities. Traditionally, it is mixed with ice water to separate the anise and essential oils from the alcohol. One liter should last a person years.

It’s been prohibited and then legalized off and on in most western nations since the 1850’s.

There was a long time misconception that it caused hallucinations. In Europe, it was referred to as the “green fairy”.

Legend has it that Dutch artist Vincent Van Gogh cut off his ear while drinking absinthe. Marilyn Manson said he knocked a few teeth out while under its influence.

These are horrible representations of absinthe.

Van Gogh had a severe mental illness that included bouts of extreme depression and psychotic episodes where he would often eat his own paint and mutilate himself. He cut his ear off to scare fellow artist Paul Gauguin, not because of absinthe.

As for Marilyn Manson, I doubt he needs any help from potent alcohol to do harmful and uncalled for things.

I find  absinthe-making to be much more interesting than viticulture. I would like to make a special type that comes from Germany: hausegemacht absinthe, or “homemade” absinthe.

The German category has a lower alcohol content, and places more emphasis on the aroma and taste.

I would also like to collect absinthe spoons, which are used to mix cubes of sugar into the alcohol.

There’s something very spiritual about making things by yourself rather than going to a store to get it. It makes our consumption and use more meaningful and less wasteful.

I thought about learning to make my own still as well. I could have it in my parents enormous basement incase it blows up. Then my apartment or dorm won’t be ruined.

All of this, of course, is only tentative, but I think after college, with this job market, I’ll need a hobby.