Student misses Santa

Jessica Pickens

pickensj@mytjnow.com

I remember those sleepless nights, laying wide awake wondering exactly what time Santa was coming to our house, and which Polly Pocket or Barbie doll would be under the tree. 

My older sisters and I would ritually set out a piece of Christmas cake and a mug of hot chocolate for Santa and would all squeal when we saw the left over crumbs in the morning. 

I miss Santa Claus. Sure, my parents still leave out stockings and fill it with candy from “Santa.” But those days of innocent believing are long gone, and sorely missed. 

My sisters and I all found out that Jolly Old Saint Nick wasn’t real in different ways. 

My oldest sister Erin, who is now 30, heard kids saying that Santa Claus wasn’t real when she was at school. She was curious that if this was true or not decided to do some research.  

Once Erin got home she looked up “Santa Claus” in our families World Book Encyclopedias and read that he was a “mythical character who gave out gifts.”  

My middle sister, Andrea, and I found out in less nerdy ways.  My mom accidently told Andrea, because she thought she knew. 

I found out after snoopy around my parents room and finding baby teeth and pictures I drew for Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny.

In a way, I wish I had never found out that Santa Claus-and all of the other mythical characters that come while we are sleeping- were not real.  

Christmas is still one of my favorite holidays. I love giving people gifts and seeing their reactions. Driving around and looking at Christmas decorations.  Singing “Silent Night” at the candlelight Christmas Eve service. 

But something is missing. That uncontrollable excitement and anxiety I used to feel is gone and I can’t seem to get it back.  I hope to day, maybe when I have my own children I will have that same spirit again. 

And I may never tell them that it they aren’t true and let them find out on their own. Please don’t ruin it for your children or young relatives. Let them grow up and find out on their own.